Kitchen sink dramas

Country girl just faced a challenge of earth shattering dimensions, in the most unexpected of places. The kitchen showroom to be precise.

As you will know, the very core of my inner turmoil and indeed the very reason for this blog, is the never ending city , country tug of love. But in matters of the kitchen (and indeed interior design generally) this country girl has been the most resolute of souls, a staunch modernist, clean and classic lines. "Forget this country twee bollox" was the battle cry "its gleaming modern gorgeousness for my little housey".

And indeed it was, creamy gloss handle free gorgeousness, strategically placed nightclub inspired lighting loveliness all round. Not so much a kitchen as a cocktail bar with ovens perhaps. But then it happened, country girl had passed another kitchen place and spied another shiny modern kitchen and got chatting to the owner, who seemed very sweet and slightly bored. So when he offered to do a design "that would be fabulous" was the reply. Just another option right? Yes well.

The trauma came this morning when country girl visited again, the design was lovely, rather traditional perhaps but well, functional. But then , in a chat with the design man he turned to an oak shaker style bespoke type set up. "Now" he said "I know you want modern but something likes this is very much what they like round your way". And the sales pitch began. Within 5 minutes he'd conjoured up a rural idyll of me making jam, surrounded by cheery chocolate smeared kiddies imported straight from the Boden catalogue. It was a biscuit baking heaven where Scruffbag would be a beautifully trained model of canine perfection and Cooper would return from his psychotic flight of fancy to adorable kittendom. Country girl, the epicentre and matriarch of a Larkin style clan happy in her WI bubble.

See you're picturing it aren't you? Lures you in, you can almost smell the strawberries bubbling I bet. Just about to ask me to pass a scone?

So there it was ,OMG country girl in meltdown on the verge of a total 360 giving kitchen man a blank cheque to create an oak filled cottage heaven.

But then it came, the nearest thing to a religious experience that country girl is likely to have - the rather booming voice of country boy (aka him indoors) which said "Lovely Roger, something my mum would like definitely, but a bit country twee bollocks for me". (which is where I stole the earlier line from).

Country girl wishes her readers to note that country boy was not being impolite to Roger that's how these close to Yorkshire border types are).

Anyway, the response from country girl at this point surprised even her, clearly the Boden baby fantasy sequence had upset the delicate chemical balance. And out it popped "No Rogers right, completely, its far more cottagey, what were we thinking,we'd have ruined the house, no one would ever buy it and they'd all think it was awful". Oh dear, oh deary dear in fact.

The look on country boys face was quite a picture, he had that look he gets when someone asks him if he supports Man United. Oh dear and the only response a sort of humph noise, which is never good.

An impasse was reached. A slightly horrified country boy decided country girl needed some city girl injection of some sort before contracts were signed. But holy hell what to do, cocktails at 10am frowned upon in these parts, coffee shop the only answer, which was of course the suggestion made so we could "review things". Roger was bid a fond cheerio. "Don't worry" he said "it happens. They often come in wanting modern but in the end traditionals what they buy".

They, whose they ?. Perhaps there is an entire sub colony of us out there, cruelly experimented upon as we adjust from our city heavens to life with wellies. Maybe there is a support group, others that can guide me through the transition?? So many thoughts whirring round country girls head. The coffee didn't help, country girl was well and truly in housewife mode by this point, country boy may even have been toying with the idea of a visit to A&E. As I said, oh dear.

Home now, country boy having parked the kitchen stylee debate for the sake of his mental wellbeing I suspect. Country girl retired to the sofa with some camomile tea and kitchen brochures to have a think about things. Suspect the Boden catalogue will have been hidden. So here it is country /city, city or country?? Whats a girl to do?

As I said a dilemma if ever I had one.

Ah well will ponder some more so TTFN - if you wish to fill me in on where you stand country / modern kitchen wise, please do comment below.